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Today, my girlfriend of three years broke up with me because she found a lot of red lipstick on my neck. The red lipstick was from her lipstick because she came over in the middle of the night when she was really drunk, then left. She refuses to listen to me. FML

Women...

Humans..

Amen - go get one who isn't crazy. Or, at least one who's less crazy.

or is less of a drunk?

kids...

You're better off without her.

Exactly, if shes getting drunk and doesnt remember kissing her boyfriend, who else could she have kissed and not remembered..

Holy shit, that's a good point. Yikes. Wouldn't feel too bad, OP.

yeh he may be better off without her, but whoever he ends up with is now the unfortunate one. they have to deal with being with this idiot who is capable of dating morons for 3 years, then considers it a bad thing when the relationship ends. what kind of dense pathetic fool does that?

Just Move Along without her, then she'll see what a mistake she has made dumping you over such bullcrap.

LOL yep your life sucks, bet seriously if she's such an idiot then your better without her, better now than if you were married, then you'd have to give her half your possesions.

haha, I agree, but not all women, lets not be sexist here.

Guess what, dude? That's not the real cause. Proving that it is her lipstick should be an easy exercise. Either you have become fat and boring or she is boning another guy, or both. Find out the real cause of your break-up and come back to see whether WE agree that YL is F'ed.

No, she's a drunken idiot, end of story. Really, what kind of post is this? People like you exist?

Pfft! He is probably right. Actually, maybe she thought she went to the other guy's house that night. Ah, the plot thickens!

Shadic, you're the idiot. I hope you have alcohol to blame. If you've ever been in a relationship, you must have only been the dumpee. When someone decides that they need to get out of a relationship, any excuse will suffice. You don't end a three-year relationship that is otherwise healthy because of an accusation that is so easily dismissed. Something else was going on. Instead of slamming me, you should be learning from this. Don't get fat, because you are already boring.

Perdix...shut the hell up. I was waiting for someone to come to the female's aid. It always happens. He said "She refuses to listen to me." which tells me he's TRIED to reason with her. The problem: SHE'S A DRUNKEN IDIOT! She probably remembered 5 seconds after blowing up at him and is too arrogant to admit fault.

I don't think that's really "coming to the female's aid" - I mean everyone here probably sees that this chick is a dumb drunken bitch. But it is entirely likely that he had either given her cause to suspect him of cheating before (to flip out over something as simple as red lipstick) or she was looking for excuses to get out of a dying relationship. That said, to the OP: your only regret in this relationship should be that you didn't break up with her first.

lmfao you fail perdix

Bullshit. You're being a moron. You accuse me of being boring because I'm backing the guy being dumped? Gasp, I don't suspect every single stupid breakup in history has happened before of prior circumstances! Shit happens. And as far as my personal life? I've only been the "Dumper," after two and a half years. So yes, fear my utter inexperience in this area. Oh wait! The woman in this scenario looks to be a drunken idiot. You honestly believe drunken idiots are so rational that they need to pull off some convoluted plan such as this to break up with their significant other? Yes, there's a chance that she's been boning some guy. There's also large chance that she's just a complete fucking idiot. You know, like how you're a jackass.

None of you have enough information from this short FML to have any basis for arguing, so shut up. There's a good chance the girl was desperate to leave him for one reason or another and faked being drunk. There's also a good chance she really is a jealous, drunken idiot. Damn, you're all retarded.

Perdix was JOKING. Why is everyone ganging up on him?

Because this "community" is so god-damned brain-dead the chances of something like this being genuine are semi-high. That said, I've wasted too much time on it either way.

F all your lives for being to dense to catch on to a joke. Perdix is prolly the funniest guy commenting on this site, and if any of you half-wits read other comments on other and have the skill to put two and two together you could probably conclude that this was another of Perdix's JOKES. Shadic, you sir, need to lighten the fuck up stop taking shit so seriously. Now that that's over keep making your jokes Perdix, it's one of the reasons I still come here :P

Hello?? Perdix may be right. It makes a lot of sense to me. To break up just for that is ridiculous! What's with all the hostility towards him??? He is F'kn witty and very entertaining!! :D Honestly, this site would be quite boring without his comments. I can't say the same for many people

By the sound of it, she's a cunt anways. I'm glad it's over with her.

This is not a FYL - it's a blessing in disguise. You found out she's a psycho sooner rather than later. She needs to get dumped like a bag of dirt.

like a sack of dog shit.

So.... she came over in the middle of the night, left, and yet the lipstick was still there when she saw you x amount of hours later?

Just what I was thinking - why wouldn't you wash your neck? Did you think she would find it cute that you left her lipstick there?

That's what I was thinking, too, but, to be fair, some lipstick leaves stains, especially if it's red and you don't have the proper stuff to get it off.

Finally! I was thinking the exact same thing!

Dump the lush!

Yeah, FYL

If she is having alcoholic blackouts, good riddance. Who knows who else she is crawling into bed with in the middle of the night.

She's overreacting. Give her some time to calm down, then talk w/her, prove your innocence,etc. If she won't listen, I'm afraid you'll have to move on :(.

Wipe off some of that Lipstick with your underwear when she gets done blowing you! Fuck that Bitch!!!

reminds me of a song... 'Time To Break Up.'

Take a shower....

YDI for dating someone who drinks.

You're never going to get a date with that attitude. (And before you go all "Dude, not everyone drinks, ok?" on me, I know. Neither my boyfriend nor I drink, and obviously we both have dates. But I think we happen to be two lucky, rare people, and that anyone who refuses to date a drinker is going to have a hard time finding someone to date in this day and age.)

Not everyone that drinks, does so until they get into that state. Get your facts straight and grow the hell up.

FYL for what happened but YDI too. Ever think to wash off your neck? In addition to that, you let her leave drunk. If you were a responsible boyfriend, you would have made her stay the night.

I gotta say I agree with this.

FYL for your girlfriend being an idiot, but YDI for not showering.

look at the bright side-- she comes to you when youre drunk!

You let her drive away from your house drunk?? ooh YDI

wow, when she said she was breaking up with you i would've said "fine, i don't want to date a complete idiot"

meaning.... you want to date an incomplete idiot??

You don't want to keep dating someone who's having blackouts, do you?

in addition to "you deserved it" and "yeah, you're life is fucked," we need a third option: "I dont know what you're complaining about," or better yet, a fourth option, "quit bitchin, you're better off this way."

foul I hate lipstick

the only thing that really stands out as f*d up here is the "and then she left" part....if she was blackout enough to not remember that she came over to your house how did she get around? I hope she lives close enough to you that she didn't drive! If she did drive...then YDI for letting your girlfriend, crazy as she may be, leave your house if you knew she was trashed.

and Plan B is get her drunk, and then sucker punch her pubic bone with a clinched fist.

alcoholics these days.

why didn't you wash your neck?

You deserve it for letting her drive drunk. On the off chance your area in Missouri has a fantastic late-night public transit system, you two are neighbors, or she's very environmentally friendly and therefore walks/rides her bike, I apologize. But since that is most likely not the case, you both are a couple of fuck ups.

my question is y was the lipstick still there u kno imma have to call bullshit on this one u sir have just one my very 1st shananigans post CONGRATULATIONS

Good riddance.

Good riddance indeed. Had the relationship continued, you'd probably wind up alone with half your stuff and paying child support.

Maybe she planned it because she couldn't think of any other way to break up with u :P What?! you never know :P

she probably planned all that so she has an excuse to dump you.

Sounds like a case for Forensic Files. You need Dr Henry Lee to prove your case.

i hate the assholes who say "you deserved it" HOW THE HELL DID HE DERSERVE IT?!?!?!?!

To #58: Some feminists are gonna be like "YDI for being a guy and dating a girl, making it 1 less girl that will join us in lesbianism" or something along those lines. To the OP, I have 3 things to say: 1- Women... (nuff said on that 1) 2- If she was kissing you and didn't remember, she might have done that with other dudes, or even fucked em giving you a nice little unseen STD (or potentially, in the future)... so it's good that she dumped you. 3- if you really, truly loved this girl and want her back, DONT TAKE A SHOWER! Wait until she calms down, and send her messages on facebook/the phone/email saying "i can prove to you that this is your lipstick. I will let you draw on my neck with ur lipstick and compare the 2 colors. If they arent exactly the same, you can dump me. Also, if i was with another woman like you think, why would i be dumb enough to not shower afterwards? I know you're emotional right now, but lets try to think logically OK? You know i love you" and see what she says. Now, history proves that she PROBABLY wont listen to the above, bcuz like i said-SHES A WOMAN! ONCE SHE THINKS EMOTIONALLY, LOGICAL THOUGHT IS NEXT TO IMPOSSIBLE FOR HER! But its worth a shot. And if that doesnt work, ehh u tried

I don't understand this movement of "Women are emotional and can't think logically". Wanna argue that? I'll take you down.

Nah. YDI. (1) If you don't like or want to deal with relationship trouble, then don't make relationships. (2) You let yourself take advantage of her. (3) Your girlfriend is a ditz, but you're the one that picked her.

That's why you don't do anything when shes drunk.. its not really consent unless she is sober

Doesn't she know that alcohol kills brain cells? Obviously not. Women are incapable of logical thought. Once they get a notion in their head that you are cheating on them they let their emotions take over. Any evidence you can come up with to prove her wrong is practically useless. They will not listen to reason. They believe they're right and you're wrong, end of discussion. Cut you losses now.

Jackass.

So you no longer have a bitch for a girlfriend, MLIA.

Why did you let her leave if she was sloshed?

ur girlfriend is a tool!

That sucks and I'm sorry =( But . . . why didn't you clean it off after she left? That just doesn't make sense =S

she doesn't deserve you at all . Her being so bitchy & stuff . Get over her yo! Trashing the 3 years of relationship over a lipstick mark? c'mon! you deserve better :)

I'm saying YDI because the second sentence is horribly written.

Don't you ever bathe?

grapefruitzoe: Why are you defending a slutty drunk girlfriend, but attacking the innocent boyfriend? also, grapefruitzoe, clearly women DO think emotionally instead of logically. im NOT saying that women cant think logically about LOGICAL stuff. if we are gonna argue this debate, yeah, you might even win. bcuz that doesnt have anything to do with YOUR PERSONAL LIFE! but if you saw your boyfriends room and he had a red thong under his bed, it could be his sisters and you wouldnt listen to him. he could even show u her receipt, and u would think it was a big conspiracy. OR AT LEAST, 99% OF GIRLS ARE GONNA HAVE THIS "IM RIGHT, UR WRONG, IM THINKING EMOTIONALLY NOT LOGICALLY" TYPE OF MENTALITY THAT THE OP'S GIRLFRIEND SHOWED HERE. Sure grapefruitzoe, you may be the exception. you might be the fucking queen of england, for all i know. but i do know 1 thing: MOST GIRLS are that way. a VAST MAJORITY of girls are like that. enough so, so that its good advice to enlighten guys on this fact about girls. stop telling us its not politically correct to say it, since 1 in 1000 girls doesnt think that way. bcuz guess what babe? 999 of them do, and im gonna spread the word about that, so us fellow men arent caught with our hands down getting tittyfucked by some bitches who cant think straight. ya hear?

It wasn't the red lipstick on your neck that did you in, it was the blue lipstick on your "head."

some of these fmls dont even sound real.... but omg dude! thats harsh! u should do the same thing to her! >:D make her payyyy!

Haha, if she's that much of a dumbass, don't even waste your time with her.

Haha, or maybe the OP should just fuckin' was himslef off like a normal person would? YDI

Haha, or maybe the OP should just take a shower? Y'know, like a normal person? YDI

Your ex is a stupid cunt, and a drunk for that matter.

Women are usually able to identify the lipstick shade they wear.

Man, alchohol sucks!!

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